Sun Tzu Gets Butt-Raped by Dracula

Modern forensic science has finally solved that old conundrum, who would win in a fight Sun Tzu, some ancient Chinese sales and marketing guru, and Vlad the Impaler?

Dracula would kick Sun Tzu’s arse, then he would butt-rape him to death with a large wooden stake. Can’t argue with science

Deadliest Warrior is so freaking funny.

 

Frank Beltrame Knives

A girl’s gotta own a tactical knife cos lets face it your husband, brothers, cousins or Dad can’t be with you 24/7 and a knife is a good way to stop guys hassling you and if a guy was to try and rape you, stabbing him in the happy sack is going to change his mind… and his sex

I got 3 Frank Beltrame knives. I’ve got a 20 cm B-KBiT, which is cool but you gotta learn how to use it, I’m okay with it and it only costs 59 euros.

I also got the 23cm teflon tactical switch with bayonet blade, which is so cool, and really easy to use. That only costs 59 euros too.

They’re both automatics, so illegal to carry but I don’t see why, what wrong with automatic, can open them with one hand without cutting yourself… that’s a good thing.

Anyways my favourite tactical knife: the B-Naked. I think he made it for Italian girls cos it’s sort of like an old chastity knife but it’s supersexy.

B-Naked

B-Naked

You can get it razor sharp, I get Rob to do that for me. I can’t sharpen knives. It comes in 3 funky colours: Flash Blue, Flash Brown, and Tactical Teflon. It also comes in Boring Gray but who wants that?

It’s a wicked little knife it’s only 14 cm. It’s got a 6.3 cm blade, made out of W.1.4034 Stainless Steel HRC 56… it stays sharp so it must be pretty good.

It’s also got an eagle eye open hole, which is much easer to open than a thumb stud. I don’t like thumb studs.  You can get the handle with a wood or G-10 insert, and it only costs 33 euro.  How freaking cheap is that?

 

Strength Training

Most girls seem to think aerobic exercise is the best way to burn calories and improve their cardiovascular fitness, which is why so many girls use treadmills and cross trainers down the gym, but they would actually burn off way more calories and get a better cardio workout from strength training, and they would get a more toned body, which is what most girls want, right?

Anaerobic exercise burns calories faster and increases excess post exercise oxygen consumption. So you burn up calories at a higher rate during and after training than you do after aerobic exercise but that doesn’t matter so much because you burn off even more calories in the day just resting. Strength training increases your base metabolic rate because it increases muscle mass. Every extra lbs of muscle burns off another 50 calories a day during rest. But aerobic exercise is catabolic, which burns muscle.

Some people seem to think that strength training isn’t good cardio exercise but that’s crap too. I do four 20 mins to 30 mins strength training sessions a week and they give me a great cardio workout because I have very little rest in-between sets or exercises. I do a five minute warm up with two 1kg bottles of water. I use them like clubbells.

I do keg training for my first session of the week. It’s great for power, functional strength and core stability. All you need for keg training is a keg and some water. Simple! One litre equals one kg. My second session I do sledge hammer training. I hit against a tire on the floor and a tire hanging up on a chain. The tire absorbs the shock, so it’s easy on the joints but it’s a real freaking killer.  It’s great for explosive power and your core though.

My third training session I do sand bag or tire training, which is great fun because you can throw them about without worrying about getting hurt. They’re really cheap too.  I do loads of wrestling bodylocks, lifts, supleses and tackles with them.

My final session I used to do kettlebells, but now I do stone lifting. Basque stones are great but they’re hard to get hold, sometimes I just use natural rocks for a real cave girl workout. I don’t go for weight, I go for reps to improve my muscular endurance.

 

Slave to Love

 

Aikido Knife Defences

Aikido knife defence….

What happens if you take self-defence advice from men in skirts.

Aikido is so freaking gay.

 

Aiki Master Demonstrates Ki

1oth Dan Aiki-Bullshido master Yanagi Ryuken demonstrates amazing ki power

Yanagi Ryukenusing using ki in a fight with jujitsu player Iwakura Goh

Guess ki don’t work so good after all .

 

Blonde Parking Ferrari

Blonde parking a Ferrari… Nuff said!

 

Sauna Etiquette

Sauna Etiquette…..  wear a freaking towel!!!!!!!

mixed sauna

sauna skank

I went to a public mixed sauna with Rob and Steph. We’re sitting in the sauna wearing towels when this Eastern European skank walks in, drops her towel, sits down, and opens her legs and flashes her cunt at us like that’s freaking acceptable!

I’m like, “hey bocchinara, you’re not at work now, so put your freaking towel back on.”

 

1930s Greco-Roman Wresting

La Lotta Greco-Romano

This is Italian Greco-Roman wrestling from the early 1930s. Some of their techniques don’t get used much in competitions today but they still look like they was pretty freaking good.

 

Schiaffi e Calci

Schiaffi e calci (slaps and kicks) or schiafferia co’ i cauci in Pugliese is a traditional southern Italian martial art that goes back to the late 18th Century. You can only kick below the waist and you wear normal shoes. Above the waist you can slap because old the old penal code striking with a fist was illegal but it was okay to slap the crap out of someone. But it’s nothing like karate or kick-boxing. You fight in a clinch.

When you’re in a clinch you use trips, kicks, back heels and stamps to their legs, and upperbody wrestling, and slaps and testata (head-butting) to the head. You want to try and knock them down. It goes on until someone gives up. But if you was using it in self-defence you’re supposed to stamp on them before they get up or in the old days use your spurs on them.